A Fathers Day post in The @GuardianTeach er Network

This article appears here on The Guardian Teacher Network Blog.


I have just become a father after 20 years of teaching and this week, I will be celebrating my second Father's Day. However, on this particular occasion, this Father's Day will not be spent on a Neonatal unit.


Just over one year ago, my son was born 12 weeks premature, weighing just 1lb 9ozs. Despite only 28 weeks gestation which would normally carry a 75% survival rate, his extreme prematurity coupled with an extreme low-birthweight, meant that his survival rate was more like 50-60%, similar to a premature baby born at 24 weeks gestation.

Looking back at the first four weeks of my son's life in hospital, Father's Day arrived and my first was a celebration indeed. After the typical nervous night's sleep, not quite sure what to expect in the morning, I arrived to NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) to hear of no major news or further set-backs. Our nurse greeted me with a wonderful blue rosette badge and a small card that lay on top of the incubator; the card contained a tiny hand-print and footprint stamp, no bigger than four or five cms in length; my first cuddle after 19 long days made this one of the best days of my life.

Thirty-five days later, my son was transferred 85 miles back home to his third hospital, where he spent the next 47 days in special care. He has battled through 35 days of intubated ventilation, a further 30 days on CPAP ventilation, Meningitis, four blood transfusions, a hydrocele and hernia operation. The list goes on…

Consequently, my journey into parenthood may not be a typical beginning, but some of the following scenarios I now face in school may sound familiar to you if you are a parent and also a teacher…

Firstly, let us consider sleep and tiredness.

I used to think working 60 hours a week for 38 weeks of the academic year was exhausting. How foolish was I?! Parenting a newborn takes fatigue to a new level. Exhaustion as a result of teaching does not come close. I now have to reduce my hours and find a day at work like a pleasant day off from the over-tiredness.

Secondly, the logistics of work and working.

I now have to work smarter and consider what days I have to arrive late and leave early due to childcare commitments. Where possible, I consider planning my week ahead in a different way, considering late evenings, doctors appointments and deadlines much more carefully. I did this exceptionally well before, but ponder this much more thoughtfully. I also have a new-found respect for all the colleagues I used to line-manage who are parents. I now understand and I am so sorry if I did not appear further compassionate… I find myself walking through the school gates twice a week just before the bell rings and I have the same reasons.

My suit.

Oh yes, my smart, dry-cleaned and leg-pressed suit. Your days are numbered as I arrive to work; I sit down to a meeting with a colleague and then look down only to discover a dried-out lump of porridge glued to my trousers! I am now officially part of the "stain-on-every-garment" gang as I lick my finger to rub away the stain!
Subsequently, a change in perception is the adjustment of conversation I have with colleagues and my headteacher. I talk about the work I complete at 2am in the morning or the amount of "spew and poo" I had to clean up at 6am before leaving for work… I'm sure staff do not want to hear about this, but there are some exceptionally funny circumstances with children at home that can bring about a great deal of laughter at work.
Equally, the fulfilment of teaching and parenting has taken me and my purpose to the next level. At parent evenings, I truly have something in common with every parent I talk with. I understand their frustration, their hopes and fears and the joy a good report must bring. I have stated time and time again, that parenting is the key to a successful learner in the classroom. Today, I have the responsibility to meet my own expectations…

From a business perspective, becoming a parent has allowed me to consider value for money in the classroom. Every lesson counts more than it did before. I know this is an unrealistic statement and some may ask what have I been doing for the past 20 years? Imagine some of the poorer lessons you or I have delivered? What if my son was in that class? How would I feel being a parent? I have never felt stronger about students receiving good quality lessons and learning experiences…

Fatherhood has completely changed my perception of teaching. As a parent, not only do the Peppa Pig parables improve my storyteller techniques, but now I am equipped with an array of fables and family experiences to share in the classroom or whole-school assemblies. Students thrive on real-life stories and I am a better teacher for it.

My son has never been healthier and I've never been happier. Please share the joy of Father's Day with your students and colleagues, or even make a donation to premature charities such as Bliss and Tommy's Baby. Happy Father's Day!

- @TeacherToolkit

Handbags and Gladrags on @GuardianTeach

This is my latest post on The Guardian Teacher Network Blog.

 

Handbags and Gladrags

Article no.7– May 2012

   

Embrace your school prom!

Popular culture has embedded the school prom into the UK education system. Don't shun it, argues our blogger, students and teachers need to share these magic moments.

 

It's easy to be cynical about this American imported rite of passage, but the school Prom is a beautiful thing and teachers should kick their shoes off and enjoy it. Photograph: www.alamy.com

 

"…They told me you missed school today, so what I suggest you just throw them all away. The Handbags and the Gladrags, that your poor old Grandad had to sweat to buy…"
Some of you may be humming the theme tune to The Office by now, but I'm not writing about the famous television series. I'm referring to the lyrical meaning of a very famous song that has particular significance at this time of the school year. I will return to this particular topic later…
The original song, penned by Mike d'Abo was released by Chris Farlowe. The song almost hit the bigtime after Rod Stewart re-released his version in 1972, but it wasn't until the Stereophonics announced their own version of the song in 2001 that the well-known Handbags and the Gladrags entered the consciousness of the masses.

It's about a girl taking everything for granted, resembling most young people growing up, believing that having the latest clothes will make them feel that they will fit in with their peers. What the vast majority tend to do is, forget that someone else had to pay for that luxury, and that looking trendy will get them nowhere if you don't have some sort of education.

Amazing how relevant that still is today!

Now let me paraphrase the link between the lyrics of the song and the academic calendar: "After three years of expulsion from my previous school, based on my gender, I am finally considering attending my school prom(enade) to accompany our Year 11 and Sixth Form students for an end-of-year celebration. It is an occasion I really enjoy, but with some intrepidation. Allow me to provide you with some of the finer details to consider…"

Once constrained to the shores of the USA, popular culture has embedded this particular enrichment program a place into the UK education system and the word "Prom" will no doubt, be on the lips of most students at this time of year, in and out of revision sessions.
After a term of planning and dreaming, students become more and more animated as the event looms, to gain a brief respite from the stresses and strains of the examination season.
Girls become fixated with beautiful and flamboyant dresses, hoping to be crowned "Prom Queen", while boys search high and low for that extra slice of swagger that will make them stand out from the crowd. Of course on their part, this will mostly appear to be carried out quite nonchalantly…

Weeks and weeks of discussing ideas stem from drawings etched by elite textiles GCSE and fashion A-level students, manipulating images sourced off the internet and ripped pages from celebrity gossip magazines. There will be one or two whose mother has passed a hand-me-down dress for a touch of individuality and sense of self-importance, or another 10 who cannot resist the luxury of a streched limo to take them from their front doorstep, two miles up the road to the venue or to a predetermined meeting point for all to see!
So, on a work-night, consider a late escapade with a possible overlap into your own precious weekend. It is of course, a fine-line between responsibility (in-loco parentis) and turning-a-blind-eye, relaxing with your students, celebrating the culmination of five long years of school life…

No doubt there will be some very, very loud music, plenty of bump and grind, coupled with many raised eyebrows; but ultimately, they have made it. They have made it this far through our complex education system, with all the external pressures we face as teachers that most students are oblivious too.
There will be those individuals who'll make you smile, a shy-soul who may be deserving of a cuddle you've saved for someone special; or that cocky year 11 lad that was just about to hear your morale-boosting piece-of-advice to set them on their way into life, but has asked you to dance instead! You cringe and think twice, before your colleague smirks then elbows you in the ribs…

The joys and laughter of a school prom are plenty, but the celebration is ultimately determined by the character of the students and the conditions in which the event is set. It is vital to provide the students with clear expectations and boundaries so that all parties are content. There will be a small minority who will not make it up until "the actual day" and others who may have to be turned away before embarking on the coach or long-boat.

If I said there was no alcohol consumed by students, I would be lying, as it tends to be one of the crucial factors for most schools that determines a student's final day with their peers. It needs policing…
Whatever the context of your school prom, I tell you this: Put your glad rags on and join in the festivities. We all need a forum to relax together, despite the pressures placed upon all who walk through the school gates each morning aged 4 to 68 (or whatever the retirement age grows to)!

Regardless of our throw-away society, students do design their own outfit, wear a hand-me-down with their chin held high, or even conjure up a magical piece using the cheap labour a discount clothes store. Share this moment with your students that they truly deserve. Go see a side of school life that will remind you that it's all worthwhile… My only advice is, stay away from the dancefloor!